These two things are not the same. They are very different. But we get them mixed up all the time, and that’s problematic.
Mixing up acceptance and approval creates all sorts of confusion, and misunderstandings, and cycles of abuse.
Acceptance is what we need and want from each other, but all too often we go around asking for approval instead.
And we go around giving out approval
At least my faith doesn’t look brave.
My faith looks like me being terrified.
“It will all work out.”
“It’s going to be okay.”
“Look for the good!”
These are things people say to help you have faith. At least that’s the idea.
I think most of the time people say these things because they’re uncomfortable with the raw, broken, messy, rough reality of… Continue reading
Once you see that a system is just a system, everything changes.
Once you see that the system is a man-made structure, an organization with a certain order and a certain set of priorities imposed upon reality rather than reality itself, you can’t unsee that.
You can’t trust a system again, ever, 100%.
You always have this knowing, back of your mind.
A hum, a… Continue reading
Productivity systems work best when they are simple.
Complexity adds complexity, which means that there are more parts and dependencies to manage.
However, simple for the sake of simple doesn’t always work. Too simple is just as ineffective as too complex.
A good system has to be effective, which means as complicated as necessary to actually do the job.
A notebook and a pen might work… Continue reading
What is a culture but a collection of systems commonly shared within a group of people?
What is a system but an organized set of rules, a set of norms, usually arbitrary, arranged and followed for a purpose?
Language is a system. We agree to certain grammatical rules and standards. The symbols we use to convey sound and meaning are arbitrary. The important part is that… Continue reading
People crave simplicity.
Well, I crave simplicity. Maybe you crave complexity. I don’t know.
I do know that simple rules we set for ourselves can help us succeed when we might otherwise fail.
For example, I have tried off and on for the last 5 years to get into a regular exercise routine. I’ve had sporadic success. I’ll get on a streak, be consistent for a week… Continue reading