Quit saying should

For many people, the “shoulds” of life exist because of moralistic or religious factors.
The goal is to be good.

For me, the shoulds exist because of my desire to be a better person.
The goal is to grow.
That’s an essential part of who I am. I don’t want to shut it down or cut it out.

But I hate being bullied by shoulds.

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Attention

Back to the Productivity Dictionary

a. The act of attending to someone or something, taking notice, turning your inward and outward senses toward in order to perceive and understand.

b. You can have different types of attention.

  • Cursory attention (fleeting)
  • Demanded attention (obligatory)
  • Chosen attention (free, undivided)

When the third type/level of attention becomes intent, full, it is focus.

c… Continue reading

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Suggested rules for social engagement

Optional, of course, but helpful.

1. Be careful with your Yes.

 A yes is an agreement. It’s a contract, and it’s a good idea to be careful – even hesitant – of who and what you attach yourself to in verbal contract. Casual agreement can be construed as you making a commitment when perhaps that’s not what you intend.

I have this rule because I like to make people happy… Continue reading

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The baseline is respect

Every time I run across this little quote, I love it:
Sometimes people use “respect” to mean “treating someone like a person” and sometimes they use “respect” to mean “treating someone like an authority”

and sometimes people who are used to being treated like an authority say “if you won’t respect me I won’t respect you” and they mean “if you won’t treat me like an authority I won’t… Continue reading

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