Gifts from the dead

I had been married for almost three years. We had a baby girl. I went back home to be with Mom for what would be her last month. I spent my days feeding Mara mashed bananas and rocking her to sleep, propping Mom up on pillows and sitting by her while she slept, slipping out of the house with my Dad or sister to grab a milkshake and look at each… Continue reading

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Quit writing open letters

Dear people writing open letters:

Please stop.

We all know that your open letters are not really letters to the “designated recipients.”

We all know that you’re really writing to us, the public, the masses, the mindless scrollers of newsfeed loops, the social media followers, and that you have thoughts. Opinions. Valuable opinions to share about this latest thing, this story, this whatever-the-hell happened.

And you… Continue reading

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Why I try to sound important

I have this urge to write first-person things in the plural.

“We really think that…”

Who is we?
There is no we.

It’s just me here. It’s just me responding to the email. It’s just me setting up the meeting. It’s just me answering a question. It’s just me writing a post. It’s just me.

So this WE thing…

Is this the Royal We?
What… Continue reading

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The problem with individuality

I go through life, for better or for worse, with myself at the center of it.

I don’t know how any of us can break out of that perspective, the individual perspective, the individual will, the separation of me and not you, of I and not us.

Perhaps that lesson —unity— is the lesson all of humanity must learn before we can move on to anything better than… Continue reading

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