All together

Parenting thoughts

I’ve been thinking about how often, as parents, we do most of our doing at this level we consider “above” our kids.

We don’t mean it in a rude or superior way, just that we’re all busy doing adult stuff and they’re in their kid world. Sometimes we bring them up into our adult world (let’s have a nice dinner out, let’s sit down and work on this thing… Continue reading

JOY is not an extra

Joy is not an extra

Do you find joy in the daily processes of your regular boring life?

Yes?

Good.

No?

Why not?

Joy in the process isn’t an extra or a bonus or a maybe. It’s a basic requirement.

I’m serious. You should be, too. Joy is no laughing matter, my friend! Joy is essential. Joy is breath. Joy is energy. Joy is your birthright.

If you have… Continue reading

I made this thing

Small version first

Build a small version first.

Whatever it is.

The thing you want to do. That big thing you want to do.

There’s a small version of it, and you can build it right now.

You don’t have to be an expert to build a small version. Think of it as a model. A prototype. It’s just an experiment. Play around with it.

Tinker.

The… Continue reading

Sing your little songs

Sing your little songs

I used to go out to the edge of the yard where we had a tire swing hanging from a huge old oak tree. It felt far away from everyone, and I would swing and make up songs for hours.

It seemed like hours, all alone, the lift and fall of the swing, the almost dizzy feeling, the disconnect, and the singing.

One day I heard our sweet… Continue reading

Atmosphere

An interesting experiment

Part 1. Spend your normal amount of time on social media today.

Right before you go to sleep, note your feelings about humanity on a scale of 1 – 10, with 1 being “would exterminate most” and 10 being “humanity is wonderful.”

YOU HAVE TO BE HONEST OR THIS WON’T WORK.

You can’t mark down what you wish you felt, or what you want to feel, or… Continue reading

Why would you give me this

Acceptance vs approval

These two things are not the same. They are very different. But we get them mixed up all the time, and that’s problematic.

Mixing up acceptance and approval creates all sorts of confusion, and misunderstandings, and cycles of abuse.

Acceptance is what we need and want from each other, but all too often we go around asking for approval instead. 

And we go around giving out approval

LEVEL UP

There’s another level

I have this idea that’s been floating around in my mind, that there are two levels to the world we live in:

  • Level 1: the most obvious level, the physical world with all its systems and structures, economic exchanges, and social rules.
  • Level 2: the higher (or deeper?) level, the place where we see each other for who we really are, we see what’s really going on